these past few weeks have been nothing but hell. all i have been trying to do is be better. but there are always those moments when you feel like you have failed completely. all i have been doing is trying to gain back people's trust. but at that moment when you are trying to do so hard.. they smack you in the face with reality telling you that they don't. welcome to life. reality sucks. i have fallen to my knees countless times praying that everything would be back to normal. obviously that isn't happening anytime soon. everyone keeps telling me time will heal it all.... time is taking forever! i'm wishing that i would wake up from this nightmare. i thought i was doing so well but of course i get smacked back down to ground zero. feeling like this whole thing isn't going to end. i swear its not. someone please wake me up when this decides to be over. i wish i could tell people how i feel, but words can't describe the hell i am going through.
this is such a 'pity me' blog. but for goodness sake, i definitely needed it. i do know that time will heal. seriously trying to have the patience for it. i just keep reminding myself that there can't be a rainbow without the rain. the rainbow is right around the corner. i just need to keep working hard to get there. not easy. at all. but hopefully it will be worth the wait and trials i am going to have to face.
welcome to life.
2 comments:
i love you and that is probably my most favorite bon iver song. for a reason i'm sure you understand more than ever.
not easy. but totally worth it. you are all ready a stronger person for it. don't give up. you deserve the very best!
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